I feel like I am going crazy

April 01, 2015  •  Leave a Comment

  You know those days when it feels like nothing is going to go right?  You wake up way to early and your kids get up with you because the dog was running around the house at 6 a.m., your 4 year old starts arguing with you how he wants a Kinder egg at 7 a.m.  Your 1 1/2 year old wakes up yelling no (her favourite word), and is flailing all over the place when you are trying to change her diaper.  You are out of the cereal your son wants, one of the dogs keeps barking at nothing, bottles are thrown across the room and you realize your bladder has been full for the last hour.

  Breakfast is the usual, your son eats his cereal or waffle at the coffee table while watching cartoons and your daughter throws all hers on the floor for the dog.  You are up and down every 20 seconds cleaning messes, taking kids toys from the dog, while being a referee.  I usually let the kids sort their s*** out themselves but sometimes you need to separate the craziness.  In the meantime, your coffee has to be reheated or simply drink it cold.

  Your daughter turns into a banshee at around 9 a.m and needs to have her nap.  This is when you try to get some work done (could be editing, cleaning, emailing etc.), but your son is telling you every 5 minutes he is thirsty and hungry.  He can get a drink by himself but always wants assistance.  Your daughter refuses to nap because your son decides to play as loud as he can when she is in bed.  This is the first of many arguments.

  Ah yes, then lunchtime arrives, this is so much fun (serious sarcasm here).  Your son will request something and 9 times out of 10 he will change his mind when it is ready...  We have used several tactics with him, ignore him, tell him constantly to eat his meal, bribe him with treats if he eats.  I have to say most of them work but take at least an hour.  Your daughter repeats the same actions as she does at breakfast.  I'll admit I have never been a fan of cooking, but I like it even less now that meals are such a challenge.

  Lately it seems every time we leave the house there is some sort of earth shattering disturbance that either cuts our adventures short or will cause a scene.  I am not one to care if my child is freaking out in public but last weekend my son had a meltdown in the food court in the mall.  I bought chocolate milk for us to share and he wanted it NOW.  I told him that he had to eat some fries first (yeah that's pretty cruel, right?), and he lost it!  I was getting annoyed by all the people around us turning around and smiling and or staring.  When I see a child freaking out in public I don't like to draw my attention to them but it seemed every family was staring and all I wanted to do was yell "what the f*** are you staring at"?  I think I felt like that because for the last 2 weeks my son has been somewhat of a disaster.  I'm sure being away for a week didn't help.

  I don't need to write my description of dinner as it goes the same as breakfast and lunch.

  I know that my children' happiness is far more important than getting work done or the laundry folded or the floor swept, but I need to get work done and floors do need swept so all I ask for is an hour without interruptions but I know that won't be happening.  Then all frustration gets erased when my daughter walks up to me to give me a kiss or a hug and my son says out of the blue "I love you so much mommy".  And I think to myself wow, I made these people, these 2 amazing, strong, funny, smart amazing people.  I still can't get over that.  It may be cheesy, but I love cheese and I love these two little people with all my heart.  Love does concur all and it heals you when you hurt.


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